Do we think before we blog?

There was a good article on the BBC website yesterday about pain in childbirth. For those who don’t want to read it all, here is a summation: A doctor says that it turns out that the pain in childbirth has a biochemical reason and helps us produce chemicals that support labor’s progress and bonding with the baby. It would be a good idea if women were aware of this phenomena and had access to many coping options for labor such as hydrotherapy, relaxation techniques etc. Another doctor said in response: while that may be true women should have access to epidurals.

Pretty straightforward stuff, right? One doctor says pain has a purpose and there are many ways to cope, and another says yes there are many ways to cope but its always a nice idea to have the epidural in your back pocket. I have to agree with all of that. Oh, but let me add another fact from the article, which in this modern era one would think is irrelevant given these are both medical professionals speaking. It was a MALE doctor that said women should have access to a broad range of coping tools and that the biochemical reason for the pain is to support the positive hormones. Wow. Is he a feminist encouraging us to know about our bodies? Is he a pioneer in informing women? Oh wait not today, the reaction pendulum went the other way this time - he is but a man, not a doctor, not an educator, not a professional… just a man.

I must inform you that the doctor is being crucified in the UK blogs for …well, just for being male while making a simple factual statement about the biochemical process of labor. I can’t help but think this is missing the point. He didn’t say all women should have natural childbirth, or avoid the epidural, or that we couldn’t bond with our babies if we use medication. All he did was state that it would be a good idea if women were informed about how their body works and why it does what it does and that it would be a good idea if we learned a variety of coping tools - not just the epidural.

The over-the-top emotional reaction this has received makes us look like a bunch of hysterical women - not the logical people we want the world to know we are. If a male doctor stepped forward and said “not smoking decreases the chance of breast and cervical cancer” would we shout “how dare he say that! He doesn’t have breasts or a cervix!”? If a mother said, “I do/don’t think I want my son to be circumcised” would we scream at her “how dare you, you don’t have a penis!”?

Often, when it comes to birthing we mix up a factual statement with our own fear of being judged, or we see it solely through the lens of our own personal experience. If I say the epidural has a 1% chance of giving you a spinal headache, it doesn’t mean I’m anti-epidural. If I say that I am teaching women how to use the epidural it doesn’t mean I’m anti-natural childbirth. Yet I find many will REACT as if the factual statement is a judgement. This is our own baggage. I would suggest we stop bleating among ourselves about whether or not a woman gets the epidural and what HE said about it, and start supporting each other in getting the facts about all of our choices.

Comments

[Amber]

I really like your common sense approach to this situation.